I have a drinking problem.....

Ok, so since I moved to Scotland there have been some great drunken nights...... This was not one of them.
I got a call at 6:15 Friday saying there was an extra ticket to the Scotland V. Wales Rugby game on Saturday, train was leaving in 45 minutes and they had a spare bed booked at the hotel. I quickly called my manager, got the OK and then showered, packed, drank 2 beers and ran to the train station. I made it in time, so did Matt, Adam did not. So as he was running in and the train was pulling out we were already heading to the bar. We had 2 more beers, met up with one more guy that had an early flight out of Edinburgh and made the train an hour later. The train ride down was a 2.5 hour drunken affair where I had 4 more beers, by this point I was on my way to getting quite drunk.
We get off the train, drop bags at the hotel and hit the bar at the hotel while waiting for a taxi. A few shots and a few beers and lost count.
We tried to go to 3 sister's widely known to be the best bar in town... it closes at 1 am and we got there at closeing time. That is really the only time stamp I have for this story for a while.
We ended up at a bar downtown where the real trouble started. Some of this is my memories some of this was filled in by the people around me and the people i called.
I danced with a young girl grinding on me, and when I say young she did not look a day over 17, and was prolly younger than that. I went to the bathroom and then saw my buddy Matt at the bar. I decided running up behind him and chocking him would be fun. The bouncers did not like my idea and they kicked me out of the bar. I was by this point a very aggressive American being very drunk. Bad combo!!! I let the bouncers know that the guy I was chocking was my friend..... They did not care as all 3 of us were kicked out. Words were exchanged ( I wish I knew what I said, but alas i do not) I threw a 10 p coin at the girl bouncer and said something about how she could use the money. She said she was going to call the cops. I called her bluff. She was not bluffing. Cops came and said they wanted me to leave. I told them they don't even have guns and I can do what ever I want. They said they were going to arrest me, again I tried to call their bluff, but again they were not bluffing. I got slapped with handcuffs, put in the back of the paddy wagon and taken away......
On the ride to prison I decide that I better call my manager. Very bad decision at the time. I am not so drunk that I can't talk... another problem. I tell him to get me out.... another bad decision. I get to jail still arguing with the guards there. They take all of my things, make me sign some stuff, tell me I was taken in for assault take a really bad picture of me and put me in a cell.
I look for ways to escape, finding none I start banging on the wall, there are 3 cops in my cell. They are big. I decide that I can not run past all of them and quiet down. I go to sleep on a gym mat that is in the cell on a concrete step like thing holding the small blanket I was given on top of me. There is no pillow, but I manage to go to sleep somehow
I am woken up in the morning and given a roll, tea and black pudding for breakfast. I ditch the black pudding and eat the roll and drink the tea.
I ask if the guard can flush the toilet (I pushed the one button on the inside of my cell and it is not to flush the toilet apparently) and when i can leave. I have no watch, but I am incredibly board. What seems like a few hours pass. I am released but first they take a DNA swab of my mouth, and take fingerprints on a digital machine. I walk out of the jail, ask for a cab, call Matt and Adam. They are on their way to a pub. I meet them there and quickly get right back in the swing of things.

There will be more to come on the second day of drinking. Maybe a drunker day than the first, but I slept in a hotel instead which was much nicer.

Sorry for the delay. Second installment will be coming soon

Ricky